I got out a giant jar of jelly beans this morning which can mean only one thing: it’s potty-training time. I usually wait until the hapless victim is three, but Jasper seems very savvy. Or rather, he seemed very savvy. When I was potty-training Ada last year he was into wearing underwear and sitting on the toilet just like her. But the newness has worn off and I can’t even get a pair of panties on that boy (all underwear is called panties at our house. Regardless of the size of wearer or his/her gender, they are panties. Even for Mister.) Now Jasper swats the panties away and won’t go to the bathroom in the toilet unless he’s naked and happens to be standing near one.
I missed my window of opportunity, didn’t I? [wailing] I couldn’t try to potty train two children at once. I just couldn’t! That’s the whole point of not having twins. If you have had a child for more than three years I don’t have to tell you how crappy potty-training is (pun intended). It is gross and frustrating and makes me want to bang my head against the wall.
But there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Jasper is my youngest. The last time I will be potty training anyone.
If I have to put the jelly beans away for a while, so be it. But it will happen. Oh yes, it will. As much as I dread it.