The school year draws to a close

Can you believe that school is almost over and I haven’t complained once about all the silly end-of-school activities that are happening? Welp, here it comes. Basically the last two weeks are nothing but fun times. The kids stop learning ten days before school ends because, hey, why not? Who needs to learn anything? So now we have Field Day (also knows as the festival of water. Which I can’t blame them for since it’s been in the 90’s all week), Campout Day (bring a tent! Bring a blanket! Spread lice to all your friends!), Park Day (not to be confused with Field Day), and scores of Field Trips. This all culminates with the mother of all dumb and boring events: Fifth Grade Graduation. I don’t even know why this is celebrated. It’s not like there are any kids who don’t graduate from fifth grade. It’s about as meaningful as having an awards ceremony for kids who are over four feet tall.

The most dreadful part of the graduation ceremony is the world longest slide show. There are hundreds of pictures of fifth graders doing two things: the girls are all hugging each other and the boys are all making weird faces. I don’t know who 75% of these kids are! When I went to York’s graduation I left after 40 minutes of the slide show.

I was talking to the PTA President a few weeks ago. She’s a good friend of mine and was complaining how no parents are signing up to help with the activities. “People don’t realize that if nobody signs up to help, we’ll have to cancel the event!” she wailed. My gears started turning and I told her that I for sure will not be signing up to help at 5th Grade Graduation. “nice try, Jennie,” she answered. “We’ll never cancel that.”

Drat.

| Filed under Bad Things, Kids, School

8 thoughts on “The school year draws to a close

  1. Don't forget "Bring your teacher an expensive gift because she's awesome" day. Don't they throw one of those in at the end? Or do they figure once a month for the past school year was enough?

  2. I just sent my husband a link to this post. After our daughter's TWO HOUR preschool graduation last week (with not one, but TWO slideshows), he hasn't stopped ranting about how ridiculous all of these end of year activities have become. He'll be happy to know he has some kindred spirits out there. 🙂

  3. As the aforementioned husband, I loved this post! I especially agree with the end-of-learning. It seems that once all the year-end testing is completed (2 weeks before the end of school), the teachers' attitudes are "my job actually teaching is done, let's have some fun!" I can't keep track of how many movies my third grader has watched at school in the last couple of weeks.
    And, seriously, a fifth grade graduation? Enough already! Although, I admit to being a bit of an extremist when it comes to graduations. I think even High School graduations are a waste of time and energy. Mail out the graduation certificates and get on with your life already!

  4. that's the beauty of Utah– no preschool graduation, no kindy or 5th grade or 8th grade graduation. Just one at 12th grade, when it's actually pretty meaningful.

  5. I think it's hurtful you discriminate against all the 5th graders who never grow to be 4 feet tall. My nephew really struggles with his height, and this ceremony is one of the few meaningful moments he will ever have in his short life.

  6. When we lived in Southern California, it was the end of a school year and that of course included pointless graduation ceremonies. In a news article in the LA Times, they were interviewing parents about having middle school graduations and if there was a point to them. And one parent said the following,

    "It is important to have 8th grade graduation because I don't know if my child will ever graduate from high school. So this could be our only graduation event."

    Way to encourage your child to reach for the stars.

  7. Hey Jennie,
    I just linked to your blog from bake at 350. I spent my boring online History of Alaska class reading about your fun family. I plan to come back, once the kids are fed and I put away ALL the crap they brought home from thier last day of school and read some more.
    From a procastinating blogger and a girl with a VERY popular name from the 70's,
    Melissa

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